What causes attraction?

From my experience and research, there are three major things that cause attraction:

1.) Value. This can be broken into four separate pieces: Inherent Value, Social Value, Personal Value, and Emotional Value.

2.) Techniques and Tactics. The difference between opening a seated set and a standing set, difference between a two set and a three set, dealing with mixed sets, dealing with interruptions, the difference between an internal interruption and an external interruption, etc.

3.) Calibration. What to say, when to say it, and how to say it. Understanding social interactions, understanding where you are with the girl, understanding the difference between her personal feelings versus how she is acting around her friends, etc.

Value:

What do women want? According to Do Gentlemen Really Prefer Blondes?, here’s everything women want. The taller the man, the better. A 5’6 man has to earn a quarter of a million dollars more to be as attractive to a woman as a 6’ tall man. The more average the man’s face, (looks like other people’s with no deformities) and the more symmetrical it is, the better. If he has blue eyes, a deep voice, broad shoulders, tight stomach and a small waist, a head full of hair, and a good butt, he’s golden. Anyone else, well... shove off. There’s some individuality, women prefer men with a MHC different than their own, (immunological system), and it can be detected through sweat. There is another book called The Score in which the female author went to a bootcamp by Venusian Art to see how it worked. The book only briefly mentions PUA at all, it is mostly dedicated to the exact same material as Do Gentlemen Really Prefer Blondes?

All of that falls under the category of “Inherent Value”. PUAs have fallen on their faces trying to explain inherent value, but it’s not as complicated as they make it out to be. On one camp, books by psychologists and attraction experts make it seem that personality and individual elements are all useless, and that raw genetics provides the answer.

On the opposite side, most PUAs pretend inherent value doesn’t exist at all, and that looks don’t matter at all. When scientists studied this problem, they came to the obvious, common sense answer. Looks matter, at least during a speed dating session, (3 minutes). Researchers found women selected the same men over and over again regardless of how ill-matched his personality was with what women say they wanted. As PUAs have correctly said for years, what a woman says she wants matters for absolutely nothing.

However, this seems off because many ugly PUAs have beautiful women in their lives. Mystery, Style, Mehow, Ross Jeffries, Kermit, David Shade, and several others are not attractive men. What is happening during speed dating is obvious if you ever watched a speed dating event. Almost all guys ask the EXACT same questions, in almost the same order. PUAs derogatively call this “the interview”, where are you from, what do you do for a living, etc. What inherent value gives you is the ability to ask ridiculously boring questions and get away with it. A woman will answer questions from a guy with a high inherent value, she will not from a man with a low inherent value. In short, a man with a high I.V. will go straight into rapport. If you watch naturals, this is what most of them do. Ceteris Paribus, (all else equal), an attractive man will beat out an unattractive man because the woman is willing to invest in the interaction and get to the part PUAs call "vibing".

Fortunately for you and me, not all else is equal. You still have more ways to Demonstrate Higher Value than this. The first way to do this is to pump up your Social Value. Unfortunately, this is the area most men try to pump up and that they are most likely to lie about. Researchers found this out via examining online dating ads. Men lie about their wealth and social status, women lie about their age and weight. What do you do, who are you friends with, what resources do you have, etc. Common examples of this are beautiful women with rich men, e.g. Donald Trump, Bill Gates, Kevin Bacon, etc. A good moment will be given to Mr. Kevin Bacon, who said: “Getting laid when you’re a celebrity is easy, it’s getting laid when you’re not that’s a challenge.” Social value is the common phenomenon where you have a girlfriend and women start eyeballing you when you’re with her, or married men get hit on when they have their wedding ring on, but not when they take it off.

That makes no logical sense. A man who would fall prey to "mate poaching" as Jared Diamond would put it, would be a bad long term mate. So a wedding ring does not show off his ability to commit, as some women would suggest. What it really says is that he is a mate with good resources. In general, obvious bragging about your social value is going to be viewed suspiciously by women. In cases where our communication is unclear, people rely upon verbal and non-verbal clues to judge our truthfulness. (Or truthiness, if you love Stephen Colbert.)

E.g. what body posture do you have when you tell a story about traveling the World in your yacht? If your body posture is poor, tonality is flat, words are hesistant, her odds of believing your story are extremely poor. We will discuss in further posts how correct body language can help you convey your message better.